It’s here! The Friday The 13th The Game review that I had all intentions on writing a few days after its release on May 26th. Now, almost four weeks later, I was finally able to pull myself away from my Xbox One and sit down to write this mediocre yet passionate “review”.
I’m a goddamn sucker for single room movies. I know some people hate them, and I completely understand why, but for me I buy in every time. The suspense is built without even really having to doing anything; just knowing you will be experiencing an entire ninety minute movie while the characters are confined to one single space gives me a semi-chub.
Cube is a mind-fuck of a movie
Now like I said, there are a lot of haters out there who hate this form of movie. So I’m going to split the difference with you today. CUBE isn’t exactly a single room film. Hell, I don’t even know if it’s quite a horror film. What it is, is a sick and tormenting, mind-fuck of a movie that is just as complex as it is simple. Seven strangers from all walks of life, wake up in a giant size, pseudo-Rubik’s Cube in which every identical room inside said CUBE wants to kill you.
The characters go through a Lord of the Flies-type experience. First learning about each other, then doing their best to govern themselves, until chaos ensues. The limited knowledge given for each person is just enough to keep them interesting yet never revealing more than we really need to know.
This movie actually doesn’t spell much out for you at all. You’re left to your own conclusions basically from the get-go. Which makes following along easy for an idiot like me! It keeps that eerie feeling of wondering who, what, when, where and why is this all happening — without ever really figuring it out.
For whatever reason, this movie isn’t nearly as popular as it should be. Its twenty years old but there is nothing in it which dates it or cheapens it at all. Which is even more surprising seeing as this is a Canadian made film. And being a Canuck myself I can tell you, and this may be a controversial opinion, but a lot of small budget, Canadian made film or TV projects are simply terrible.
I understand all the reasoning why we, north of the border, may not have the production quality of those in the USA but that may also be what gives this kind of Canadian movie its true “charm.” My two favorite shows in the world are Canadian made, super low budget, yet ultra-funny and creative (Kenny vs. Spenny and The Trailer Park Boys).
Much like those two shows, CUBE embraces its flaws while highlighting its strengths. So that might be why I have such a fascination with this badboy and choose to disregard some of the horrendous acting. It’s more or less a single room thriller, made on a super tight budget with tons of creativity, fun kills, great visuals and an even better mystery. It stands out because there isn’t a lot like it floating around.
So do yourself a favor: if you’re sick of reboots, super hero movies or cheeseball comedies then give CUBE a watch. It’s not full of gore or jump scares so your girlfriend will give it a chance too.
If you made it this far in my article then you obviously have a gift for making it through cheap Canadian content. But this movie is a perfect example that low-budget does not always have to mean low-quality.
Fear, paranoia, suspicion, desperation are all found within the six sides of this CUBE.
Reading time: 2 min
A regular go-to, show-any-friend-who-hasn’t-seen-much-horror, watches-a-couple-times-a-year movie that I constantly find myself going back too, is arguably one of the most realistic non-fiction movies in the genre. It is a movie that gets under your skin on such a humanely realistic level that no one, anywhere, can say they haven’t thought of the situation happening to them. I’m not talking about the monster under your bed, but more that strange sound you hear in your closet. That fear of looking out your bedroom window and seeing someone looking back. This movie reflects that all too real vibe of being watched but too scared to look and actually see but what happens when you do.
This all goes back to why your Mom told you to never talk to THE STRANGERS.
Keep reading after the trailer
From the opening prologue that teaches you about the “real life” couple that was subjected to this madness thus inspiring the film, I’m always hooked. With only a little backstory, this movie wastes little time in its quest to unnerve you. The rare art of having little to no background music forces you to sit and marinate in all the dialogue, noises and dread shared between the characters. A tactic often used poorly, but when correct, brings a sense of urgency and suspense to a scene.
I’m going to do my best to not spoil anything, although this movie is not one to overthink. It has an incredibly basic plot of having your home (that personal feeling of your safe place) invaded by people that you have no connection with. This invasion is random – an act with no rhyme or reason other than to hurt and scare.
These strangers aren’t just out for blood. They seem to want to scare you much deeper than any wound can. It is much like how my love for Freddy Krueger began. He wasn’t only on the hunt for victims but rather he took great enjoyment in the traumatization before their demise. Ultimately the sadism of the predator’s actions is what satisfies them. These three masked intruders seem to share the same love for that kind of macabre arousal.
Why are you doing this to us?
The setting is the real star of the movie for me: a beautiful, somewhat outdated, home sitting on a large chunk of land. A long gravel driveway leads up to it. Far enough on the outskirts of town to feel isolated. Funny enough, it almost perfectly mirrors my first girlfriend’s house, allowing me to really picture myself there and in the couple’s shoes. The vastness of the property actually serves as the main limitation too because you are looking for any option to escape and end this nightmare.
The utter madness displayed by the three strangers really is the terrifying part. Worse than The Devil’s Rejects because those people are whacko and make no qualms to hide it. You could say that these strangers are all mentally ill but you can also imagine them just being terribly bored with life. That’s what is really off-putting about it all. There is a real sense that they are all simply making this up as they go along. It is like they jumped into this scenario without any plan, yet seem to have no emotion or worry about it going forward. That’s what is terrifying! They could just be anyone; acting upon one bad thought.
I’ve seen a lot of horror movies in my life both fiction and non-fiction (true crime); documentaries with real footage that have audio so you hear serial killers give detailed descriptions of their murders. But there are a few scenes in this movie which will forever haunt me. The shots where you see these faceless entities hiding in the shadows with only enough light to show their masks remain a particular highlight. They watch you from near and far. This psychological torment is something I still think about any time I hear a bump in the night.
Even after all that horror is completed, the sun rises and a new day starts, the absolute creepiest, weirdest, skin crawling, spine tingling, nightmare inducing line is said (in my opinion). The female lead Kristen (Liv Tyler) simply asks “Why are you doing this to us?” and the female stranger responds….”Because you were home.”
Sweet dreams thinking on that one guys. And whether or not we will ever get to have the long rumoured and production stalled ‘The Strangers 2’, there is no denying exactly what this 2008, 10 million dollar budgeted, horror movie gave us that nine years later I am still scared to think about who could be outside my window or at the front door.
Reading time: 4 min
