Bub’s doing a wine review, suckahs, for two reasons: One he’s drunk, and two wine is red like blood and zombies and shit. This wine happens to be a bottle of four buck chuck aka Crane Lake Pinto [sic] Noir. Noir means death and shit in France and Pinto is either a shitty car they make in France, or it means that this wine is made out of beans — but this don’t taste like no bean wine. Would a bum that only drinks Pino Noir be considered a beano?

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What you want to do with this here wine is let it air out in a decanter (that’s French for pretentious) for about a week. Then guzzle that shit like it’s nobody’s business.

Crane Lake Pinot Noir: Wine. Blood. French. Bub. 

Oh yeah it’s good once you air it out. See ya next time, suckahs.